Trust

Note:  This post is more of a musing than a desire.  All day, when I thought of posting, I thought about trust, but I thought of it from several different viewpoints throughout the day.  I found that interesting and so, in the end, I decided to just ponder trust itself.

It is all about trust, isn't it?  From the moment you meet someone, there are a series of cliffs you jump off as relationships progress.  Some people reach a cliff that they can't take and the relationship ends.  Others (God knows why) continue to move forward.  Your first kiss, your first sexual experience, marriage, family - Trust.

The cliffs eventually come further and further apart and finally, you settle into a life together.  You may see the ugly head of jealousy appear once in a while, but you are not asked to really leap like you were in the beginning.

And then something happens.

Someone changes.

It is no one's fault - people change.  Sometimes, one person's heart takes them in a new direction.  Whether or not they follow that direction, trust is lost.  Love has changed and it is not what it was.

Sometimes, it is not their heart that moves, but their desires.  They admit to themselves, and maybe to their partner, a need.  The need takes on legendary proportions because it is the first time, in a long time, that there has been a cliff.

I guess a desire is still an action of the heart.

When two people really love each other, they will do most anything to try and grow together.  To adjust to the changes of one or the other.  And sometimes it works out.

But, mostly, we don't hear those stories.

This story will be one of the ones that works out, if I have anything to say about it.

But in the meantime, I am working on my trust.  Not that I am worried about others (for a change).  Actually, those fears that have plagued me for years have actually completely vanished.  As soon as we signed a contract, I no longer worried.

Rather, I am trusting that the things I am doing and the me that I am being will be what He actually wants and/or will live with.  Sometimes, when we get what we want, we don't want what we get.