I am not a patient person. In fact, one might say that I am very impulse oriented. This trait actually gets me in trouble more often than not, but I also think that it provides a good foil in my relationship with Him. He is a patient person. He apparently doesn't feel a need to know about or unwrap a present early. He can wait to experience pleasure.
So, I have turned over my pleasure to Him and have agreed that He will have the responsibility of training, punishing, loving and using me as He sees fit. I have agreed that I am not to request to service Him, or if I do, I may face punishment. Under no circumstances whatsoever, may I ask twice.
This is hard for me. However, His way has proven correct in this relationship over and over again, so I am trying to learn patience... He did reward me over the weekend for being good. It is Monday, though, and my anxiety level is starting to register just a bit higher.
We had a fantastic weekend, really spending time together as friends, which is a blessing in any relationship - you have to nurture the friendship as well as the other areas. I enjoyed it very much.
We just didn't do things within the D/s dynamic and that is fine, yet I still can't help wishing for some of those things. Because I never fully appreciate what I have. I am always looking forward to the next thing. Le sigh.
I was over at this blog this morning and I liked how this couple has days set for "reassurance", which is similar to maintenance, and that SHE has to say, "It is time." Unfortunately, that probably won't work to train me, because I don't have trouble saying it is time. I have trouble enjoying the moment and waiting for it to be time.
Is it time?
No comments:
Post a Comment